Ephesians  5

Ephesians 5

Following God’s Example 5:1-2

Ephesians 5:1 Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children 5:2 and walk [live] in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. NIV

5:1 Therefore, be [become] imitators of God as dear children. 5:2 And walk in love, as [just as] Christ also has loved us and given Himself for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet-smelling aroma. NKJV

The Argument Paul is Presenting

       Paul is urging the Ephesians to follow the example of God. What example does God give us that we can follow and try to imitate. The concept illustrated three times is love. This is what Paul has in mind, since we cannot copy God as Creator and Master of the Universe. First, God calls us His dearly loved Children. Thus we to love those in Christ, following His example who loves the worst of us.  

  Second, we are to walk the way of love as Christ gave up  himself for us. Thus, we are to live our lives, sharing ourselves, what we have, in love with others. Believers cannot live for themselves, isolating themselves from others or not caring when others are in pain.  

As God’s Dearly Loved Children, the Children He Loves

  Always remember, you are God’s loved children. You have not been left as an “orphan” (John 14:18), one who has no one to love them and care for them.

  We know the truth about ourselves. We are not so lovely, often mean, cruel, hateful, deceptive, yet somehow God loves us. Would we do that, if we were God, from our calm eternity? Humans sometimes have a hard time loving their wives, husband or their own children, let alone strangers across the globe. Who dress different, speak different, follow different customs and different doctrines, yet they also love God. Paul would challenge us to let love above line of language and culture.

Follow God’s Example

  This is God’s example, for us to follow. We are to imitate God’s love, in our circle, even to those who we are not attracted to or wish to avoid. How can we imitate God’s example? We know that God has loved us, cared for us, while we were faulty. With a measure of knowing God’s love for us, really knowing it, we are led to treat others with love also, as best as we can, sometimes only from a distance. We learn to hold firmly to, loving the fallen, in hope they will also come to know God’s love.

God Loves Us in the Present Tense

  In the Greek the love of God for us, is in the presence tense, not in the future tense. God’s love is not just mere toleration of us, until “In a flash, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed. For the perishable must clothe itself with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality” (1 Cor 15:52,53). God does not wait for us to be changed into a superior body and mind, to love us. No God loves us in the present, as you seek Him today.

  As you read this, acknowledge, be assured, let it settle profoundly deep in the pockets of your soul—God Loves Me. Acknowledge it to God right now, because it is true.

God’s beloved Children and His Beloved Son

       God declares us to be his dearly loved children.  When God, spoke out loud to the world said “This is my Son, whom I love” (Matt 17:5 NIV). The literal Standard Version reads, “a voice out of the cloud, saying, “This is My Son, the Beloved, in whom I delighted; hear Him.” Dearly love or beloved are the same Greek word.

       In the Literal Standard Version of Ephesians 5:1 reads, “Become, then, followers of God, as beloved children.” The love God has for his Son is paralleled in the love He has for his children, his followers. In the longest prayer of Jesus to his Father he prayed, “My prayer is not for them alone [his disciples]. I pray also for those who believe in me through their message [their Epistles]… Then the world will know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me” (John 17:20,23). The Love of God is in the same degree, same equal proportion, just as, even as, God loved his Son.

When God loves, it is wholehearted and passionate, far different then we have learned about love in our society.

Christ Also Love Us and God Loves Us

  Paul is not satisfied in just openly, in unmistakable words, to say the God loves you. He adds an assurance, saying in the same manner that God loves us, Christ also loves us.

It is almost like being loved by two parents, both mother and father. However, the love of Christ is not just words alone in which we are to accept, it was in action, giving himself for us.

       How do we get closer to this love that both God our Father and His Son Jesus Christ has for us?

  First, acknowledge the truth of God’s love in your prayers. Ask God to reveal Himself to you, so you can “Taste and see that the Lord is good” (Ps 34:8). That you may “know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God” (Eph 3:19). Make this a subject of earnest prayer.

  Second, take time to think and read about descriptions of God’s love. In time, often shorter than you expect, you will know about God’s love for yourself. Let it settle deep into the pockets of our souls. And then, do not lose it by activities that counter the influences of the Spirit as Paul as already described in Ephesians 4:29-31.

As a Sacrifice to God for a Sweet-Smelling Aroma

       Here we can see the death of Christ and the resulting atonement that provides forgiveness and adoption into the family of God. Jesus did it for God his Father. It was his personal sacrifice, not only for man, but for God. The amazing thing is that all the inconvenience, pain and humiliation that His son endure for sinners, did not make God despise fallen humanity. But instead the suffering his son was a sweet-smelling aroma, not due to his Son’s pain, but due to the results—forgiveness and eternal life. God looked past the great sacrifice of his Son—to see the results, and it pleased God to see us saved with eternal life. Only love of the Son for the Father, For the joy set before him” in displaying his love for us, “he endured the cross, scorning [disregarding] its shame” (Heb 12:2).

       God loved his Son enough, God send his loved Son on a death mission, bringing about the redemption of humanity. It all was a sweet Aroma to God, because his love could be extended, on account of His Son, to awaken sinners to love of both the Father and the Son.  

Therefore Follow God’s Example

  We are to live different than those who do not know God, because we are God’s dearly loved children. This is the same Greek word used at the baptism of Jesus when the Father publicly said, “This is my Son, whom I love” (Matt 3:17) or the Son that God dearly loves. Due to our faith in God’s son, we are loved by God within unimaginable love of a similar measure that God has loved His Son. God is not stingy or restrictive with is love, he offers it broadside. He offers it, not to those who are as perfect and holy as His son, but to those who seek Him, needing forgiveness that the heart openly confesses to God on a daily basis. “Praise be to God, who has not rejected my prayer or withheld his love from me! (Ps 66:20).

“Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens” (Ps 68:19)

“The Lord lives! Praise be to my Rock! Exalted be God my Savior!” (Ps 18:46)

“For the Lord is great and greatly to be praised” (Ps 96:4 NKJV)

“While I live I will praise the Lord; I will sing praises to my God while I have my being” (Ps 146:2 NKJV)

“Praise the Lord! For it is good to sing praises to our God; For it is pleasant, and praise is beautiful” (Ps 147:1 NKJV)

So Let’s Ask Paul, What Way are We to Live Differently?

  Is it in the way we dress, the food we eat, the style of our clothes, the amount of money we give to charity? Or is it seen in accepting a set of church doctrines or a prophetic understanding of end time events? If not, how should we as children loved by God, loved by Christ, loved from heaven and loved on earth—imitate them?

  Paul tells us something so simple, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you” (Eph 4:32, last verse). Paul’s advice is to be compassionate, and kind, based on the example of God toward us. In this way we imitate God in a demonstrative way we show ourselves to be “children of God.” Every time we have an opportunity to be kind, forgiving and caring for others—we please God who has loved us. This is exactly what God did, in send His Son in sacrifice, on obedience to the will of the Father—so that the honor of a heavenly full colored love can envelope confessing humanity.  This is Paul’s theme till the end of this chapter.

Follow God’s Example—

  Now that we know that God loves “me,” view this as if you are a young child in His arms feelings loved by your good Father.  Very young children wish to imitate their fathers and please them in expressing the same love they received to others.

  Paul asks us to copy the example of God. What example do we have of the “goodness of God” (Rom 2:4 NKJV) that we can see clearly enough to copy? The foremost picture of the love of God is John 3:16. Which tells us that God’s love is giving in nature. That God gave up something dear to his heart, his one and only Son. God did not so love the world because of this world’s perfection, but despite all its imperfections, God still loved this world.

  The 25 words of John 3:16 have a global and universal appeal. It captures our attention. It stands apart, earning the 1st place of over 30,000 verses of the Bible. Once heard, it becomes instantly known and seldom ever forgotten. We have asked several believers with late-stage Alzheimer’s, who had lost their memory of people and places, if they knew John 3:16. Amazingly they did! Any other Bible verse they could not remember.

God—Greatest lover.

So loved—The greatest degree.

The world—The greatest company.

That he gave—The greatest act.

His only begotten son—The greatest gift.

The whosoever—The greatest opportunity.

Believeth—The greatest simplicity.

In Him—The greatest attraction.

Should not perish—The greatest promise.

But—The greatest difference

Have—The greatest certainty.

Everlasting life—The greatest possession.

  God’s love for the world, leads all humanity to perceive a good God. God’s love is self-giving at cost to himself—Self-giving for me and for you. A God with all hands-on deck, not remote in action He has “predestined us for adoption to sonship” (1:4).

  King David remarked “O Lord, Your tender mercies and Your loving kindnesses, for they are from of old” (Ps 25:6 NKJV). God “crowns you with lovingkindness and tender mercies” (Ps 103:4 NKJV). The word loving-kindness means “goodness, kindness and love.” It comes from God, not due to any human merit or acts of obedience. The word “tender-mercies” portrays God’s warmest affections for us. These qualities of God are not newly found, but are from old, from eternity God has always been like this.

  The Apostle John has said, “See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!” (1 John 3:1). Look at it. God’s love is not given in small amounts, but lavished on us. John draws the same conclusion contemplating the love of God, as Paul which tells us to follow God’s example, “Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another” (1 John 4:11).

As a Fragrant Offering—

  Jesus offered himself, as the way for those whom God loves dearly, to receive the gift of eternal life from His hands. Jesus did this with no regret or hesitation, out of love for his Father and love for us, to Him it was dual love. His life on earth was so sweet or fragrant, God said out loud, “This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased. Listen to him!” (Matt 17:5). In that God loved his Son, Jesus our Lord, includes us, all of us, you and your loved ones, when we have faith. “Jesus said to the woman, “Your faith has saved you; go in peace” (Lk 7:50).

  “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God” (Eph 2:8). God’s gift is His saving love, redeeming love, forgiving love, generous love, faithful love, earnest love, wholesome love, true love, enduring love a love that last for eternity.

       When we have faith in the forgiveness of sin provided by Christ, because both Christ and His Father loved us, it is a gift of love from both of them. This gift can’t be earned, now or ever. Because God intended this gift, of something this world can’t offer—a resurrection from death as “heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ” (Rom 8:17). God gives us a gift that can be only received from Him by faith alone. For “all are justified freely by His [God’s] grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus” (Rom 3:24).

As a Sacrifice to God—

  In the Old Testament, when animals were brought to the Hebrew Sanctuary, they were regarded as gifts to God. They were accepted by God, as an acted-out drama that permitted forgiveness of sins. Without a way for sinners to receive God’s eternal life, their “iniquities” will “separate” them from God and hide “his face” from them (Isa 59:2). Jesus voluntarily, on behalf of his love for God and us, gave something of Himself, the only possible sacrifice, which was a divine substitute that pays the penalty for our offenses of unkindness, selfishness and the many hurtful things we have done. Now there is hope for all the repentant forgiven, to be part of a larger family of God, who regards us as His dearly loved children. God has conditions to be part of his eternal family, in our future, they are love based. So God and his Son by their grace, gives us the condition we need to move forward into forgiveness and removal of all our guilt, made available by our faith.

       God has gone the second the mile for us. He has promised the Holy Spirit to “abide with you and will be in you” (John 14:17 NAS)—this makes all the difference in our lives as belivers. Yes, this is true.

Walking the way of Love

  Walking is an example of making progress, every day. Paul wants us to make progress “in the way of love” (1 Cor 14:1) in our Christian lives. To move in the direction of having more love, on a daily basis is the prayer of Paul: “And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight” (Phil 1:9).

When walking in love we will give ourselves to others in their needs, at our expense and trouble, even if they are ungrateful. More love to Thee, thus More Love to All Others. This is the way we become imitators of God. Some people, we can only love from keeping our distance. We can love the very unlovable, by asking God to reveal His love to them.

More love to Thee, O Lord,
  More love to Thee!
Hear Thou the prayer I make
  On bended knee;
This is my earnest plea:
  More love, O Lord, to Thee,
More love to Thee,

Paul now Directs Attention to the Conduct

of God’s Dearly Love Children 5:3-12

Ephesus 5:3 But among you there must not be even a hint of (1#) sexual immorality [promiscuity], or of any kind of (2#) impurity, or of (3#) greed, because these are improper for God’s holy [loved] people. 5:4 Nor should there be (4#) obscenity [vulgar, dirty], (5#) foolish talk [without reason] or (6#) coarse joking [indecent, vile, nasty], which are (7#) out of place, but rather thanksgiving [with grace]. 

5:3 But (1#) fornication and all (2#) uncleanness or (3#) covetousness, let it not even be named among you, as is fitting for saints; 5:4 neither (4#) filthiness, nor (5#) foolish talking, nor (6#) coarse jesting, which are (7#)       not fitting, but rather giving of thanks.

The Text

  The NIV adds the expression into the Greek text, “not even a hint”.  A more exact translation would be “not even named,” as in the NKJV.  Yet the Berean Study Bible and the Amplified Bible supports the NIV translation, which gives added emphasis to Paul’s instruction.

  The NKJV used an older word of sexual immorality, fornication. Both words mean

prostitution, including adultery and incest, which themes were part of ancient Greece literature.

       The NKJV used older words uncleanness and covetousness, while the NIV used newer words as impurity and greed.

But Now, After What Paul Just Said

  Considering God’s love calling us His “dearly loved children”. Now in view of the love Christ has shown us, we are to “walk in the way of love” (Eph 5:1,2). What does it mean to walk in a way of the love like God has shown us? Paul wants the Ephesians to see that sexual immorality is incompatible with God’s proven love. God’s love and sexual promiscuity are polar opposites.

1a—Sexual Immorality

  The Greek is just one word, a feminine noun called porneia. Which in general is sexual immorality, including fornication, adultery, and other illicit sexual practices. The word is derived from pernaō meaning “to sell off”, such as selling of human sexuality, as in pornography and prostitution. These forms of sexual misconduct are widely prohibited today, due to Christian influences, by all secular nations of the world.

  In ancient Rome and Greece there were no restricted laws about buying and selling slave women or men, of any age, which could include abusive practices. Open prostitution was common throughout all of the Roman empire, even some pagan temples included its practice, following the example of the temple goddess.

2b—Sexual Immorality

  It is not possible to account for all the misery, regret, difficulties, loss of self-respect and personal failure of experiencing warm-affectionate, trusting, over a long period of time, family love. All due to sexual indiscretions.

To men and women, sexual impurity sends them downward into a path which hardens them to hear the gospel call of repentance and the privilege of being “led by the Spirit” (Gal 5:18) in their lives. These men soon develop “eyes full of adultery” (2 Pet 2:14), seeking to take advantage of every possible opportunity, to satisfy their lust, safely and quietly. With some, the sexual urges become so strong, they lose the ability to control them.

  This condition is incompatible with the love of God. It will silence the awareness of the Holy Spirit in our lives, before they know it depression and despair will settle in the place where once joy and “love of the Spirit” (Rom 15:30) lived, before their lustful “desires lead them on and drag them away” (James 1:14 NIRV).

  Yes, sexual sins will drag us away from God, from true love, from family and if not arrested by the hand of God, “into the darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth” (Matt 8:12).

2—Impurity or Uncleanness

   This conveys the idea of sexual defilement, which separates believers from their faith in God. Paul does not use this term with the OT meaning, which was eating certain unclean foods which create a state of impurity (see Lev 11). In the sense Paul is using this term, is that it does weaken or destroy faith, resulting in spiritual “darkness” (Eph 5:8). Which is often followed by cruel deeds, at the expense of others. “For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life” (1 Thess 4:7).

  Jesus and the disciples confronted and cast out “impure spirits” (Matt 10:1), which was demon possession. Perhaps sexual immorality opens the door of our souls for evil influences to dominate us. Since it makes us unclean—unclean evil spirits find an open door to our hearts.

3—Greed or Covetousness

This means to desire what belongs to another. As the 10th commandment says, “You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife” (Ex 20:17).

       Why is it called greediness? Because coveting is never satisfied with one sensual look or thought but wants more and more. Never satisfied, this is how the pornographic industry becomes rich. Users of pornographic literature are never satisfied, because they are caught up into the vice grip of lust of their hearts. To which Jesus says “your whole body to be thrown into hell” (Matt 5:29).

4—Obscenity or Filthiness

  This is behavior or speech that is shameful, indecent, or morally offensive. There will come a time when “the judge of the of all the earth” (Gen 18:25), “will bring to light what is hidden in darkness and will expose the motives of the heart” (1 Cor 4:5).

  Thank God we are “covered with the precious blood of Christ, a lamb without blemish or defect” (1 Pet 1:19). Those who by faith are “in Christ” have nothing to be ashamed of, even the record of one’s wanton mistakes is covered, not ever visible. Visualize this as fact.

5—Foolish Talk

  In general this means to be involved in trivial, frivolous and meaningless conversation for hours at a time. Sports and Political talk are example of conversation that are of value only for the day, and often just for that hour. Who would wish to spend a day replaying an old sports or political podcast?

  In Paul’s farewell address to the Ephesian Elders he told them: “Now I commit you to God and to the word of his grace, which can build you up and give you an inheritance among all those who are sanctified” (Acts 20:32). Paul told the Corinthians that he had been given “authority” by “the Lord…for building you up, not for tearing you down” (2 Cor 10:8; 13:10).

  Building others up is done by means of encouraging words and loving deeds for the betterment of all. Words have power, they create influences for good and bad. “A wise word that you speak at the right time is a beautiful thing. It is like a gold apple on a silver plate” (Prov 25:11 Easy English Bible)

       The way to avoid hours of sports talk which gives endless analysis of its players, is to let our “conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt” (Col 4:6). Jesus taught this principle about our words and our lives saying, “You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot” (Matt 5:13).” Words from the mouth of the wise are gracious” (Ecc 10:12)

  Saltless words hurt, cut and burn others. Not one of these slanderous words that are recklessly spoken are worth remembering as salt that was saltless, could be used to preserve foods in ancient times.

May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart

be pleasing in your sight,

Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.

Ps 19:14

Gracious words are a honeycomb,

sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.

Prov 16:24

The tongue of the righteous is choice silver,

but the heart of the wicked is of little value.

   The lips of the righteous nourish many,

but fools die for lack of sense.

Prov 10:20-21

Course Joking and Jesting

  Paul is talking about degrading and indecent conversations. Such is not good-natured but full of mockery, with sexual illusions that are embarrassing or insulting. Purity of speech is a leading sign that one has been with Jesus.

       When Peter was watching the trial of Jesus by the Sanhedrin, he was recognized because of his Galilean accent, which was like Jesus who spend much of his ministry in Galilee. Peter denied even knowing the man Jesus. To prove it “he began to call down curses, and he swore to them, ‘I don’t know the man!’ Immediately, after Peters curses, a rooster crowed. Then Peter remembered the word Jesus had spoken: ‘Before the rooster crows, you will disown me three times.’ And he went outside and wept bitterly” (Matt 26:73-75).

  Peter, to prove he was not a follower of Jesus used profanity, for Jesus was known as a man of very uplifting and pure language. For it was well known that the followers of this man Jesus had a purity of speech about them, because they had been with Jesus who was known never to use such speech, even when provoked.

       Another point to learn from this account. Peter was convicted of his sin, instantly. So likewise will one who has been with Jesus, his ill spoken words with inappropriate comments, will bring tears of repentance before God, because they know they have hurt the Lord they love.

7—Out of Place, Not Fitting

  The reason why the above examples are so out of place, is that our “bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit” (1 Cor 6:19). This means we have a holy influence, a divine presence that abides with us, making a circle of influence to elevate the conversations around us. Paul wanted to be a “pleasing aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing” (2 Cor 2:15).

  If we are followers of God, our Father’s example, we will be very uncomfortable with any slang that makes light of darkness and dishonors God. A believer will feel very out of place, where faith in God is ridiculed with words that slander Jesus and heavenly things. They will avoid Bars, Saloons and other places where light and trivial language is the conversation theme. Often with impure words, are part of the atmosphere. If you are about to enter such a place, run the opposite way, calling of God to deliver you from the unclean demons inside that place.

Thanksgiving

  Thanksgiving as David expressed to God, “I will give thanks to you, Lord, with all my heart; I will tell of all your wonderful deeds” (Ps 9:1) and “Praise the Lord. Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever” (Ps 106:1). Praise and thanksgiving to God cannot be expressed alongside obscenity or greed. They are opposites as hot and ice cold. A believer makes the spirit of praise and thanksgiving to be the answer to all coarse joking or jesting, that often bites into another.

A Lesson by King David

  In Psalms 51 Nathan the prophet confronted David after the sexual affair with Bathsheba. David knew he would lose the Holy Spirit, unless God would change his heart. He prayed:

“Create in me a clean heart, O God,

And renew a steadfast spirit within me.

 Do not cast me away from Your presence,

And do not take Your Holy Spirit from me.”

Ps 51:10-11

       God’s love for us, is not self-indulgent, in any way, of gaining pleasure from our discomfort or shame. As the sexually immoral take selfish pleasure in adultery, lust or rape. God’s goodness and love, which forbid these activities, which are the opposite of true love, are for good His extended family, which live into eternity. “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God” (Matt 5:8).

Ephesians 5:5 For of this you can be sure [very confident]: No immoral, impure, or greedy person—such a person is an idolater—has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God. 5:6 Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of such things God’s wrath comes on those who are disobedient. 

5:5 For this you know that no fornicator, unclean person, nor covetous man, who is an idolater, has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God. 5:6 Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience. 

Impure or Unclean

  The Greek word is translated as either unclean or impure. Jesus “cast out” “unclean spirits” (Matt 10:1; 12:43) 17 times in the gospels. Paul links together the sexually immoral with the concept of unclean spirits, which are demons that have taken over human beings.

  It was Paul’s understanding that immoral acts such as adultery and fornication are opportunities for demons to take over human desires. The evidence of demon influence is when sexual desires influence the thoughts, ideals and dreams in everyday life. To satisfy these desires all kinds of evil, murders, rapes, incest and abuses in the home, are noted daily in news accounts.

  John calls it “lust of the flesh and lust of the eyes” (1 John 2:6), giving the location of these desires as physical cravings. Life becomes “chasing after the lusts of your own hearts and eyes” (Num 15:39).

Covetous and Greedy

       Paul calls the sexually immoral covetous, as the 10th commandment says, “You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife” (Dt 5:21). They are called greedy because they are likely to have a wife and yet wish to add another man’s wife, they are never satisfied.

If there were no civil restraints against sexual aggression, society would be broken with injustice, violence and murder on an unimaginable scale. This is often the condition of war, where the victors take the spoils of women and goods.

Idolator

       Paul further calls the sexually immoral person an idolater. Which means, no matter if the person driven by lust is a member of the church in good standing. They are not worshiping God at all; they are serving an idol of their own making called the goddess of sexual satisfaction. This is where their hearts are at, whether they love their idol or not, they are devoted to serving their needs. 

No Eternal Inheritance in God’s Kingdom

  Even if the sexually lustful person should profess to believe in Jesus. Paul says let no one deceive you, that is to tell you that any form of lust is not important to faith in God.  These deceivers may assure you that going to church on the Lord’s Day, paying tithe or something else, will give you an inheritance in heaven. They are deceiving you if they make these things more essential, then purity of heart. “Flee the evil desires of youth and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart” (2 Tim 2:22).

God’s Wrath--Modern Idolatry 

       Greece and Rome had many idols but, in our day, we have countless more idols.  Each channel on TV that promotes sexual content is an idol temple. Movie theaters that display on a super-sized-screen adult themes, as the worshipers eat popcorn and drink sugary drinks, are devoted to an idol. The language of idolatry is cursing, with impure vulgarity.

       According to Paul worshipers of these idols that offer to their devotees of sexual displays of immorality, face the wrath of God. We should be aware that when we willingly pay large sums to the gods of impurity to set for several hours in their temple to watch Big Screen Productions such as 007, unknown to us spiritual “darkness” (Eph 5:8) finds entrance into our souls.

  What are the results? The worst kind possible, the “love of the Father is not in them” (1 John 2:15). They lose the love of God in their lives. What a huge loss these gods of the fleshly lust extract from a believer. Sadly if they are a pastor or gospel worker their ministry is severely compromised and will be devoid of the Spirit.The worst thing possible happens to leaders of the church who are compromised by modern idols of our society—don’t even know they are attempting to serve two masters, one God and the other “lust of the flesh”. Thus they cannot warn their members of the severe danger of modern idolatry. They cannot tell them as John said, “Dear children, keep yourselves from idols” (1 John 5:21).

       Christians that follow the idols of “lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes and the pride of life, comes not from the Father, but from the world” (1 John 2:16). That is our world that is full of idols that encourage sexual freedom, pride which is love of their many possessions and money, exchange these for the inheritance of eternal life with a city built by God. This is a miserable exchange, for it brings, unless they awaken to the truth of these idols, they will face eternal non-existence.

  Prophecy depicts a judgment day, “Then one of the seven angels…saying to me, “Come, I will show you the judgment of the great harlot…with whom the kings of the earth committed fornication, and the inhabitants of the earth were made drunk with the wine of her fornication” (Rev 17:1,2). The “kings of the earth” are the influencers of society, coming from Hollywood studios and the internet, that spread western cultures of unbridled sex appeal, which focus on crime, blood and sex to entertain. They will have a sad day of judgment for their influence on society.  

  The "Great Harlot", John has already described is “love of the world” its lust for sexual things, its commercialism and thirst for wealth and money, which will all “pass away” (1 John 2:15-17).

  Immoral and godless behavior has made our world, our society, drunk. The internet offers much helpful learning and harmless entertainment, but the wine of fornication will intoxicate the mind with insatiable desires, when anyone freely turns their eyes to the power of war, bloodshed, hatred, murder all mingled with exciting sexual displays. “The god of this age has blinded the minds of unbelievers, so that they cannot see the light of the gospel that displays the glory of Christ, who is the image of God” (2 Cor 4:4)

Nobody needs ever to face the wrath of God. Not ever. Unless…

1.     Unless they have not been “born of the Spirit” (John 3:8)

2.     Unless they have not become a “new creation” (2 Cor 5:17).

3.     Unless they have not been “made alive with Christ” (Eph 4:5).

4.     Unless they have not been “made alive in the Spirit” (1 Pet 3:18).

5.     Unless they have not been “raised up with Christ and seated with him in the heavenly realms” (2:6)

6.     Unless they have not “been saved, through faith, that not from yourselves, it is a gift of God” so that they can become “God’s handiwork created in Christ Jesus to do good works” (2:8,10)

7.     Unless they have not “become a dwelling where God lives by his Spirit…a holy temple to the Lord” (2:21,22)

8.     Unless they have not “put off your old self…corrupted by its deceitful desires” (4:22)

9.     Unless they have not “put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness” (4:24).

10. Unless they have not been “marked in Him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit…as God’s possession” (1:13,14).

11. Unless they have not been “taught by God to love one another” (1 Thess 4:9) and not lust after each other.

12. Unless they have not been “saved through the sanctifying work of the Spirit and through belief in the truth” (2 Thess 2:13).

13. Unless they have not “let the Spirit help us in our weakness” (Rom 8:26).

14. Unless they have not been “anointed” with God’s  “seal of ownership on us and put his Spirit in our hearts as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come” (2 Cor 1:21-22).

15. Unless they have not experienced “God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us” (Rom 5:5).

16. Unless they do not have the Helper, Advocate and the Spirit of Truth,” to “live [abide] with you and be with you” (John 14:16;17).

17. Unless their “bodies” have become “temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you [inside], whom you have received from God?” (1 Cor 6:19).

18. Unless they have let the Spirit “guide” them (John 16:13), “teach” them (John 14:26), so they can “walk by the Spirit” (Gal 5:16).

19. Unless they have been filled “with the knowledge of His will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives so that you can live a life worthy of the Lord and please him in every way, bearing fruit of in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God…” (Col 1:9,10)

20. Unless they have been  “rescued” from “the dominion of darkness and brought into the kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins” (Col 1:13,14).

21. Unless they have understood that when they “were dead in your sins and in the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made you alive with Christ. He forgave us all our sins” (Col 2:13).

22. Unless they know that “at one time we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another. But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life” (Titus 3:3-7).

  What are the consequences to a Christian community when, “deceitful workers, masquerading as apostles of Christ” enter their church? When “Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light” through these “deceitful workers?” (11:13,14). Sexual sins, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, slander, gossip, arrogance and unbecoming Christian behavior will become common among them. The “secret power of lawlessness” (2 Thess 2:7) will work in their midst.

Ephesians 5:7 Therefore do not be partners [have no share] with them. 5:8 For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live [walk] as children of light 5:9 for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth [what is true] 

5:7 Therefore do not be partakers with them. 5:8 For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light 5:9 (for the fruit of the Spirit is in all goodness, righteousness, and truth), 

Once Darkness Now Light—An Overview

       Paul is referring back to the condition of the Ephesian Roman that had no restrictive laws about sexual activity. A slave owner could demand sex from his female slaves at his pleasure. Prostitutes were common all over the city. As the result, they were living in darkness and had “no inheritance in the Kingdom of Christ of God” (Eph 5:5).

       Now, they are children of light, for “God is light; in him there is no darkness at all” (1 John 1:5). Living in the light will recreate in them a mood to be good to others, to be pure and to treasure the truth of the gospel, “for the praise of His glory” (Eph 1:12).

Do Not Be Partners with Them

  Who is Paul referring to? The sexually immoral who are “unclean” due to their sexual free attitudes, pornography addiction and “course joking” that is filled with indecent innuendos (Eph 5:3-6).

  Paul warns believers about being close business partners or committing to the marriage of such a person. This presents many dangers to one who seeks purity and want to “walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh” (Gal 5:16).

  The love of God for us when he has "predestined us" (Eph 1:5) to be His sons and daughters—does not give us license to partner with darkness. Although God is ready to forgive even in the very things that he forbids, yet it such close association can lead to spiritual loss, a living sense they are children of God slowly fades to a distant memory.

  Some may think they are strong enough to resist darkness; they may be able to rise above it with much prayer. However it is hard for such one to discern the effect this has on their awareness of the Spirit’s presence in their lives. Light and darkness don’t mix. Darkness will attack the light in an effort to dim the “love in [of] truth” (Eph 4:15), while the light, which is truth, will be attracted to those who seek the light and truth.

You Were Once Darkness (5:8,11; 6:12)

  The Ephesians were once pagans embracing an immoral lifestyle as a way of life. They use to dwell, in their imaginations and dreams, in darkness. Jesus said, “If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness!” (Matt 6:23). They are “unfit for doing anything good” (Titus 1:16).

“The night is nearly over; the day is almost here. So let us put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light.  Let us behave decently, as in the daytime, not in carousing and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and debauchery, not in dissension and jealousy. Rather, clothe yourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ, and do not think about how to gratify the desires of the flesh” (Rom 13:12-14).

But Now

  The darkness is gone. NOW they are children of light. This change has come to the believers in Ephesus not because of something they had done, but the grace and love of God.

“Arise, shine, for your light has come, and the glory of the Lord rises upon you” (Isa 60:1).

Jesus said, “Therefore, if your whole body is full of light, and no part of it dark, it will be just as full of light as when a lamp shines its light on you” (Lk 11:36).

“The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it…
The true light that gives light to everyone was coming into the world…
This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but people loved darkness

instead of light because their deeds were evil …

Believe in the light while you have the light,

so that you may become children of light …

I have come into the world as a light,

so that no one who believes in me should stay in darkness.”

(John 1:5,9; 3:19; 12:36,46)

“The god of this age has blinded the minds of unbelievers, so that they cannot see the light of the gospel that displays the glory of Christ, who is the image of God… For God, who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God’s glory displayed in the face of Christ” (2 Cor 4:4,6).

“Giving joyful thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of his holy people in the kingdom of light” (Col 1:12).

  Paul is explaining why it is important not to be joined with those who practice darkness as their way of life. The way to know the difference between darkness and light is that the constant expression of those living in the light is trying to be good to others (goodness), endeavoring to be fair and protecting the innocent (righteousness), with the habit of telling the truth (truth). The “ways of this world” (Eph 2:2) VS the “way of life you learned” (4:20): which is to “let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds [goodness, righteousness & truth] and glorify your Father in heaven” (Matt 5:16).

Fruit of Light

  Solomon writes in his epic love poem about the beloved, "Is all I delight to sit in his shade, and his fruit is sweet to my taste” (SS 2:3). The fruit of the light will be sweet and enjoyable, as was the thought of the bride standing near her beloved.

       Jesus tells us that when we “bear much fruit” we show ourselves “to be my disciples”. In the next breath Jesus said “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love” (Jn 15:8,9). Thus, the sweet fruit of light is “from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows” (James 1:17)—it is love, the “love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit” (2 Cor 13:14). The “fruit of unfailing love” (Hos 10:12).

       The “fruit of the Spirit” is full of light it is “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control” (Gal 5:22,23).

Paul is thinking of three spiritual qualities

that are to be fruitful in our lives

That creates a life full of light.

 The first Fruit of the Light is All Goodness 

  It is a virtue that embraces kindness, agreeableness and a readiness to help others without imposing conditions. An attitude of seeing the best in others and one who seeks friendship with those considered on the outside of society.

  Goodness is the 6th “Fruit of the Spirit”. A personal quality that springs forth without hesitation, from the heart. Believers are those “who loves what is good” (Titus 1:8), and love doing good.

 The Second Fruit of the Light is Righteousness,

  Which is sourced from God the Father, called “the righteousness of God” (Rom 1:17; 3:21; 10:3). That is God’s personal “righteousness” that is “credited” (Rom 4:3,4,5,9,10,11,22,23) to the believer, giving us forgiveness of sins, meaning that God finds no fault in us. This is due to a righteousness that is not from us, but from the grace of God Himself imparted to us.  

       In this setting the fruit of the light as righteousness means doing what is right for other people, even though they don’t deserve it. Just like God has done for us. Righteousness, that is like God, which gives to others, within their ability, respect, justice when others have been mis-judged, acceptance of those who have been broken.

The Third Fruit of the Light is Truth

  The Third Fruit of the Light is truth. Paul is referencing what he had previously said that believers are to take off the “old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires” (4:22). When believers are partnered with unbelievers, telling the truth is not always their objective. Sometimes partners of darkness willingly “pursue dishonest gain” (Titus 1:7) if profit can be gained.

       Jesus told us that “the Devil” is “the father of lies” (John 8:44). Those who tell lies for their advantage are unknown to them are siding with the Devil.

  “Children of light” (5:8; John 12:26) they will show, “Integrity, seriousness and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned” (Titus 2:7,8). Those living in darkness are often “full of meaningless talk and deception” (Titus 1:10).

Ephesians 5:10 and find out [try to learn] what pleases the Lord. NIV

5:10 finding out what is acceptable to the Lord. NKJV

Find Out, Try to Lean

  In Greek, this means to put something to the test. When we don’t know what to do, which way to turn or where to go. When we are confused and feel we need for God to show us “the way.” This phrase is an excellent way to come to know the will of God.

  When we pray for God to reveal His will for us. In prayer try to find out what pleases the Lord.  as you pray for directions in your life. Tell the Lord you want to do what is good and know how to please Him. Consider all the options, submitting your heart’s desire to please God. This is a prayer to keep in mind throughout your day.  Prepare your heart with devotional “songs from the Spirit” (Eph 5:19).

“‘Our Father in heaven,

hallowed be your name,

your kingdom come, your will be done,

on earth as it is in heaven.

Matt 6:9,10

  To know what pleases God, you need to frequently be in Scriptures, reading and praying for understanding. Not endless u-tube sermons or a book that is about God. Let God speak directly to you as the “Word of Life” (1 John 1:1)

“Since God is light and in Him there is no darkness at all” (1 John 1:3). Look into the pages of the gospel and “the light of the world” (John 8:12), will come out of the Word, in prayer. Jesus said, “The words I have spoken to you—they are full of the Spirit and life” (John 6:63). The Holy Spirit will be your guide, coming out of the “Word of Life” (1 John 1:1), much more, more then the words of a sermon. Especially if the sermon uses Scriptures so little. 

  Read what Paul has written in Ephesians and Colossians—and you will know beyond a doubt what to do. “Though I sit in darkness” not knowing what to do, “the Lord will be my light” (Micah 7:8).

The Lord is my light and my salvation—

whom shall I fear?

The Lord is the stronghold of my life—

of whom shall I be afraid?

Ps 27:1

  We at Brother’s in Scriptures, consider this one of our favorite ways to pray for the direction of God. It is a common theme in the New Testament.

So we make it our goal to please him…

2 Cor 5:9

Do not conform to the pattern of this world,

but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.

Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is

—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

Rom 12:2

We continually ask God to fill you with the knowledge of his will

 through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives,

so that you may live a life worthy of the Lord

and please him in every way:

bearing fruit in every good work,

growing in the knowledge of God, Col 1:9,10

Now may the God of peace…

equip you with everything good for doing his will,

and may he work in us what is pleasing to him,

through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen.

Heb 13:20, 21

May these words of my mouth and

this meditation of my heart

be pleasing in your sight,

Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.

Ps 19:14

 Ephesians 5:11 Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds [unfruitful] of darkness, but rather expose them. 5:12 It is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret. NIV

5:11 And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather expose them. 

5:12 For it is shameful even to speak of those things which are done by them in secret. NKJV

5:11 Do not participate in the unfruitful deeds of darkness but rather expose them. 5:12 For the things they do in secret are shameful even to mention. NET Bible

The Text

       The NIV says have nothing to do with fruitless deeds of darkness. The NKJV says to have no fellowship with the works of darkness as in being in league with their pagan ways. The NET Bible gives us a better understanding of the Greek word as to not participate. Do not join in with their activities, their projects or be closely identified with them, setting aside your ways of faith in God. Why? Their actions do bear good fruits, they are not good for themselves or for others, but more, they are deeds of darkness and sin. Instead we are “put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light” (Rom 13:12).

Darkness

       This is the central issue of this passage. It includes all the dark issues Paul has just described.

“Sexual immorality”, “greed”, “obscenity”, and “coarse joking” and “impurity.” The very opposite of “goodness, righteousness and truth” or what is true and honest. (Eph 5:3-7).

       What is “greed”? It is building a larger, more expensive home than needed. It is owing more material things after we already had more than enough. Owning six cars instead of what is needed. It is the love of materialism that gives the highest value in life to material possessions and wealth.

       John describes darkness as any form of hatred. “But anyone who hates a brother or sister is in the darkness and walks around in the darkness. They do not know where they are going, because the darkness has blinded them” (1 John 2:11). Hatred will nearly always lead to perfect blindness. Where one feels justified in holding hatred of another believer. They have become spiritually blind. Then, no matter what position they may hold, as a Bishop or Ordained minister—they are blinded by the darkness. Thus those who love darkness the “Blackest darkness is reserved for them” (2 Pet 2:17), where “everyone will have to give account on the day of judgment” (Matt 12:36).

Having Nothing to Do or Participate With Them

       Instead “walk in the light, as he is in the light” (1 John 1;7). Jesus said, “The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are healthy, your whole body will be full of light” (Matt 6:22). As such we must be very careful at what we look at, what we take into our bodies, our minds and hearts. “To those who are corrupted and do not believe, nothing is pure. In fact, both their minds and consciences are corrupted” (Titus 1:15).

Finally, brothers and sisters,

keep your thoughts on whatever is right or

deserves praise:

things that are true, honorable,

fair, pure, acceptable, or commendable.

(Phil 4:8 GOD’S WORD Translation)

Expose them

       By our fruitfulness, as Jesus said, we are to “bear much fruit” (John 15:5), by abiding in Him. Our standards, our generousness, our family moral values, our true love, our honesty, our faithfulness, or our simple lifestyle. Most of all our love for our God has directed our ways, which are a open invitation to others as to the values found in our “hope of eternal life” (Titus 3:7) and our “faith in the Lord Jesus and [our] your love for all God’s people” (Eph 1:15).

  Believers have learned of the dangers of living by the fruitless deeds of darkness.  Now Paul wishes them to live in such a way as to expose the corruption of this world. Jesus in the Sermon of the Mount said people are not to put their light “under a bowl.” They do not hide their faith and love.

  “Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven” (Matt 5:15,16).

   The way to expose the darkness of society, is to put on the “armor of light” (Rom 13:12), made possible because we are following “the light of the world” (John 8:12).

Shameful Actions of the Sons of Disobedient

  “Let nobody deceive you with empty words, for because of these things God’s wrath comes on the sons of disobedience” (Eph 5:6 & Col 3:5,6))

  It is dangerous to spend any time examining darkness, watching those who practice darkness in movies or books. Darkness is contagious. Not only do these dark scenes reappear as memories. But also, we are likely to relay evil to others, even as we condemn it, thus the life cycle of darkness is spread.

  Paul tells the Roman believers that “I want you to be wise about what is good, and innocent about what is evil” (Rom 16:19). And evil is darkness (John 3:19).

Re-focus Off Darkness

  When we focus on the “goodness of the word of God” (Heb 6:5), we will expose their shameful darkness without saying a word of condemnation or judgement against them. Thus we are to “let your light shine before people, so that they can see your good deeds and give honor to your Father in heaven” (Matt 5:16). Thus we “overcome evil with good” (Rom 12:21), revealing it darkness by light and put it shame by “his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves” (Eph 1:6).

 Ephesians 5:13 But everything exposed by the light becomes visible—and everything that is illuminated becomes a light 5:14 This is why it is said: “Wake up, sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.”

5:13 But all things that are exposed are made manifest by the light, for whatever makes manifest is light. 5:14 Therefore He says: “Awake, you who sleep, Arise from the dead, And Christ will give you light.”

Turn on the Lights

       When we are exposed to the “Word of Life” (1 John 1:1). For “God is light” and “in Him there is NO Darkness at all” (1 John 1:5).  Something happens? Something changes? The person exposed becomes enlightened, illuminated and they also become a light. Their light is due to Christ Jesus shining on them. The “light of the world” (John 9:5) shines through them, lightens them up with glory.

       One of the many prayers of Paul was “I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people” (Eph 1:18).

Wake up Sleeper

       When we are asleep, we are in darkness, our eyes closed. We can’t see any light. Spiritually Paul is appealing to some of his readers to move out of death, from their spiritual darkness, by turning to Christ. To let “His light shine in our (their) hearts” (2 Cor 4:6).

  Some will come to know their deeds are dark, when exposed to honest truths, to goodness coming from the “kingdom of light” (Col 1:12). They are called to be the “children of light” (5:8). To let “The true light that gives light to everyone” (John 1:9), shine on them and they will radiate the light of God’s “abundant goodness” (Ps 145:7) around them.

The Lord bless you

and keep you;

the Lord make his face shine on you

and be gracious to you;

the Lord turn his face toward you

and give you peace.

Num 6:24-27

Since, then, you have been raised with Christ,

set your hearts on things above, where Christ is,

seated at the right hand of God.

Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.
For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God.

When Christ, who is your life, appears,

then you also will appear with him in glory.

Col 3:1-3

Ephesians 5:15 [Therefore] Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise [fools] but as wise, 5:16 making the most of every opportunity [taking advantage], because the days are evil. 

Ephesians 5:17 Therefore do not be foolish but understand what the Lord’s will is. 5:18 Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit, NIV

5:15 See then that you walk circumspectly, not as fools but as wise, 5:16 redeeming the time, because the days are evil.

5:17 Therefore do not be unwise, but understand what the will of the Lord is. 5:18 And do not be drunk with wine, in which is dissipation; but be filled with the Spirit NKJV

Be Very Careful

  We are to give special emphasis to prayer at every step of our lives. To inquire of God what the Lord’s will is, at every turn, every opportunity, every circumstance, every challenge we meet daily and often in life. It implies thoroughness and carefulness in action or thought, as we “pray without ceasing” (1 Thess 5:17 NKJV).

“Watch your life and doctrine closely” (1 Tim 4:16). Watch your life, so that the seeds of darkness, hatred, judging others as if you were God, do not take root in the soil of your heart. Remembering what the Apostle John says, “All wrongdoing is sin” and “keep yourself from idols” (1 John 5:17, 21).

       “Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation” (Matt 26:41)

       “Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful” (Col 4:2)

       “Be serious and watchful in your prayers” (1 Pet 4:7 NKJV)

  “Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven” (Matt 6:10).

  “We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love each other. Anyone who does not love  remains [abides] in death” (1 John 3:14).

Be Wise not Foolish

  That is to make poor choices, because you did not take time to learn the will of God for you. A foolish way to live, it would be to marry a person on our own whims. Foolishness is the frequent cause of serious mistakes, human disasters and loss of opportunities that God was directing us into.

“Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock” (Matt 7:24)

         “The way of fools seems right to them, but the wise listen to advice” (Prov 12:15)

       “Fools show their annoyance at once, but the prudent overlook an insult. (Prov 12:16)

       “Those who trust in themselves are fools” (Prov 28:26)

“Assuredly, I say to you that it is hard for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven. And again I say to you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God” (Matt 19:23,24 NKJV). Because money and material things become to them all they think about. It is what they think makes them special and important in society. When everything new grows old and perishes with its use, “but whoever does the will of God lives [abides] forever” (1 John 2:17)

Failure of Making the Most of Every Opportunity

  Wasting away hours of the day in mindless media and movie channels. We don’t know what can happen tomorrow, James says, “you do not even know what will happen tomorrow! What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes” (James 4:14). For us tomorrow could be the last day of our lives.

“As we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone, and especially to the family of faith” (Gal 6:10).

Making the Most of Every Opportunity—Redeeming the Time

  This means keeping the house in order, the finances, the garden, and our children educated and trained. Sometimes opportunities come only once in life. Such as a scholarship that is turned down for forgotten pursuits. Thank the Lord for every good opportunity that comes into your life. “Be thankful” (Col 3:15).

“In the morning, Jesus saw Peter and Andrew casting their nets for fish. He said to them, come, follow me… At once they left their nets and followed him.”  (Matt 4:19-20).

Jesus saw “Matthew sitting at the tax collector’s booth. “Follow me,” he told him, and Matthew got up and followed him” (Matt 9:9).

  What if Peter, Andrew or Matthew said to Jesus not today, maybe later. I am busy now. Nothing else they would do in their life would matter at all.

Days are Evil

  The spiritually wise know that evil, darkness is present in society, business and government. They do not carelessly challenge evil. Only fools think they can resist the Devils arrows of “lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes and pride of life” (1 John 2:16)—easily enough.  Daily we are to ask God to bless us, to keep us in the way of faith, love and hope. To show us His favor in all we do. As we look to do good to others, and for God to give us peace.

“The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine on you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace” (Num 6:24,25).

“Reject every kind of evil” (1 Thess 5;22).

Do not be Drunk with Wine but Filled with the Spirit

  When drunk we are led to say and do things that are the results of alcohol. When full of wine, there is no room for the Spirit, the two are antagonistic and opposite. Wine will stay with us, and the Spirit will leave, and we will not know what the Lord’s will is.

  Just as wine has a strong influence over our judgment, reason and behavior. So likewise the Spirit will exert a strong influence over our judgment, giving us self-control, with an abundance of love and with motives to do good.

We are be filled with the Spirit, for “by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live” (Rom 8:13). Only through the Spirit is it possible to silence the calls to evil that arise from within our sinful inclining nature. Through the presence of the Spirit “we [can] have the mind of Christ” (1 Cor 2:16).

Wine is a mocker and beer a brawler [foolish behavior];

Whoever is led astray by them is not wise.

Prov 20:1

Thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards

nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.

1 Cor 6:10

Old wine and new wine

take away their understanding.

Hosea 4:11

Be careful, or your hearts will be weighed down

with carousing, drunkenness and the anxieties of life,

 and that day will close on you suddenly like a trap.

Lk 21:34

Ephesians 5:19 […as you are filled with the Spirit] speaking to one another with psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit. Sing and make music from your heart to the Lord, 5:20 always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. NIV

5:19 speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord, 5:20 giving thanks always for all things to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, NKJV

With Psalms and Hymns

       The Greek word for hymns “in antiquity was a song celebrating, praising pagan gods, heroes, and conquerors.” Paul is most likely referring to singing the Psalms which could be easily hummed throughout the day. The music was intended to give rise to thanksgiving, and praise. Today this is best way to praise God, by listening and repeating the words of praise and thanksgiving to God in a praise song.  

  The Early church was Psalms focused. They were to encourage each other by quoting the Psalms, in verses and songs. It is estimated that Jesus quoted from the Psalms over 50 times and in the NT the Psalms is quoted about 100 times.

       We can imagine the first belivers coming together sharing encouraging, heartwarming and uplifting Psalms in their worship service. The Psalms and the gospel uniquely go together, they can easily be blended, more than any other OT book or the five books written by Moses.

       Some of the best-known modern worship praise songs uses phrases from the Psalms more than any other book in the Bible.

  To the Colossian believers Paul instructs them to repeat the Psalms in worship. He says, “let the peace of Christ rules your hearts” and “let the message of Christ dwell among you…as you teach…one another…through the Psalms…” (Col 3:15,16). Singing and reading the Psalms creates a rhythm of praise and trust in God bringing vibrant color and it opens us up to embrace uplifting, encouraging thoughts that are life changing. A worship service without praise Psalms is half empty. The old hymn “Onward Christian Soldiers” can never match the simple melody of a praise song.

Always Giving Thanks to God the Father

  For our meals, home, employment, family and everything that comes to your heart. The things that bless us, small, good things of the day give us a reason to praise and give thanks. In the Psalms, praise and hope are mentioned over 200 times. Praise to God, coming from the Holy Spirit, accompanied with prayer creates a positive worship atmosphere.

Songs from the Spirit

  The Greek reads literally “spiritual songs” as in the NKJV. The Greek word for "spiritual" is an adjective for the word “spirit.” Thus the passage could be translated as “Spirit Songs”. Songs inspired by the Holy Spirit, songs that move your heart to love and praise God. Songs that sing about the fruits of the Spirit, such as love, joy and peace.

  There are some songs that are deeply spiritual, causing us to pray with praise and thanksgiving with uplifted arms. These songs will generate more love to God and more inner peace. Through music we become more aware of the Spirit’s presence in our hearts and sing in appreciation.

Spiritual Music

  We are encouraged to keep spiritual music playing throughout the day. It should be inspirational music that causes you to feel the movement of the Spirit, on the strings of your hearts.  We should come to know the songs that awaken the spirit of praise and devotion to God, moving your heart. Songs that awaken prayer, praise and love for God. You will know what songs are touched by the Spirit or leave you empty.

       This is Paul’s solution to “walking in the way of love” (Eph 5:2) and “overcoming evil with good” (Rom 12:21). Notice the role of the Spirit in urging us to sing Psalms and praises to God. Songs of praise that sing of the love of God, is the life-giving sap that runs from the “Vine” to the “Branches” (John 15:1-6).

       If we are inclined to sing crude secular songs with strong sexual overtones, to attend rock concerts that make no room for God. We should know that these songs are sponsored by the “ruler of the kingdom of the air” (Eph 2:2) or “the dominion of darkness” (Col 1:13), which is a means for evil to spread a pale of spiritual darkness which blinds spiritual eyesight. Some secular songs invite darkness into our souls. For “what fellowship can light have with darkness?” (2 Cor 6:14).

  Which means that in some songs we invite darkness into the living rooms of our heart, this darkness will in time seek to dominate. Since dark songs don’t mix with Spirit Songs, when we come to worship God, the spirit of praise and love will be dampened. Meaning we will sit in our seats with no “joy of the Lord” (Neh 8:10).

       Paul told the Colossian believers to “let the message of Christ dwell among your richly… through psalms, hymns and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts” (Col 3:15,16). Thus by Spirit songs the believer can take the peace of Christ with them through the day.

  Wonderful is a worship service that offers warm, heart embracing songs that inspire us to praise and open us up to worship because “God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in the Spirit and in truth” (John 4:24). In truth deep inside us, not formal or untouched by the Spirit, with “Christ in you, the hope of glory” (Col 1:27).

“Shout for joy to the Lord, all the earth.

Worship the Lord with gladness,

come before him with joyful songs.”

Ps 100:1,2 NIV

  The Hebrew word for “shout” means “to cry out, to make a loud noise, to sound an alarm.” In Psalms 47 we are told to “clap your hands, all you nations; shout to God with cries of joy.” In 1 Chron 15:28, we have a picture of the Israelites conducting worship to God “with shouts, with the sounding of rams’ horns and trumpets, and of cymbals, and the playing of lyres and harps.”  We should never be ashamed of loud music with vocal praise in song accompanied with many different instruments—in worship of God. For God not is ashamed of it either when praise is the intended purpose.

An Important Introduction

For Both Husbands & Wife

Eph 5:21-33

The underlining issues that Paul is teaching, in this section on husband and wife is all about home management, and the need for order in the home. “For God is not a God of disorder but of peace” (1 Cor 14:33). When disorder is lacking there will be “selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice” (James 3:16).

From a belivers perspective, Paul placed Christ at the head position in the home. The interesting aspect of this is that both husband and wife have the same head, Christ Jesus. In home management the wife and husband are assigned by God an order, with their children in submission to their parents.

In Paul’s home and marriage instructions, he broke with Roman and Greek culture which did not allow women to have any responsibility in civil or military affairs. The absolute power of the pater familias (head of the household), a Roman custom deeply embedded in their culture, meant that the husband had nearly complete authority over his wife and other household members.

Paul raises the status of women to the highest point, similar to Christ.  In that husbands were to love their wives as, just as Christ loved the church. Women were not objects for abuse, anymore then Christ abuses the members of the church. The husband’s treatment of their wives was to be valued as a personal relationship, centered in love openly, frequently and freely given. As important a believing man places the Lord as a priority in his life, so does a husband place his wife as a priority, above work and play, in his life. Without love, nothing else in a person’s life, matters at all.

Paul’s view of a belivers home is radically different to the socially accepted Roman way.

New Rules New Covenant

Under the “New Covenant” (Lk 22:20), the roles of men and women were to be collective and individualized. The man has not been given right to be first, over his wife’s devotion to God. The prayers of both husband and wife are equally valued by God, for “God shows no partiality” (Acts 10:34).  For example:

1)    Jesus broke with custom that men were not to talk to Samaritan women. When a Samaritan woman came to draw water, Jesus said to her, “Will you give me a drink?” “His disciples had gone into the town to buy food.” (Matt 4:7,8). To this woman, Jesus gave detailed knowledge, not given to the disciples about true worship. Then he sent her as the very first gospel teacher, to her village. Did Jesus place women in leadership positions? Yes, He did. Did Jesus place this woman under a man’s authority? No, He did not. She was under the authority of Christ Himself. Such is every married woman; her highest authority is Christ Jesus and her Father in Heaven.

2)    Jesus broke with custom by first revealing himself, after the resurrection, to a woman. When Peter and John came and saw the empty tomb Jesus remained hidden, till Mary came to weep. Jesus delayed his trip to heaven, to first talk to Mary. Then Jesus again broke social custom and commissioned Mary to be the very first gospel worker, to announce his resurrection to the disciples (See John 20). Jesus reversed the order of men first, who believe that women should always be under his authority. Just imagine the missionary work Mary did in relating the account of her encounter with the resurrected Jesus. Did she need Peter’s permission to teach the gospel? No, she did not. Was she told by Jesus to submit to male authority. No, she was not. She had permission from Jesus to go on mission.

3)    Jesus taught the grand principle, that leadership is never to take the position to be first. No one can demand it. Jesus sat down, called the twelve, and said to them, “If anyone desires to be first, he shall be last of all and servant of all” (Mk 9:35). If the husband really thinks he deserves to be first, just because he is male, he is mistaken. The role of a husband as head in the home is to be that of a servant toward his wife and children. The New Covenant, in the blood of Christ that is applied to all, allows no kingship. No president over everyone else. No voice that demands obedience, based on position. Authority is to be shared with love and consideration that Christ died for all. That all have equal access to his grace, mercy and love.

4)    Paul taught, yet not understood, the principle that in Christ, man and woman are equal. “For as many of you as were baptized into Christ have put on Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus” (Gal 3;27,28). Any ideas that home leadership must be male, should watch themselves very carefully. He should be careful, for he might reject the very person, God has chosen to take leadership, his wife who has the talent to lead in the care of children and the household affairs.  Whoever proposed the idea that women are to always be excluded from home leadership, are self-centered. He needs to put himself last of all, as His Lord has commanded him.

Who was the Ephesian Letter written to? All Spirit Filled Believers in Christ

Paul is directing his instruction to married couples in the Ephesian church that “were once darkness, but NOW you are light in the Lord” (Eph 5:8). Paul affirms that to “each one” of them “grace was given…as Christ apportioned it” (Eph 4:7).

Paul is writing to devout, grace-filled believers, reminding them that there was a time they were lost in the world. “Remember that at that time you were separate from Christ, excluded from citizenship in Israel and foreigners to the covenants of the promise, without hope and without God in the world.” This is not the course for “now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near by the blood of Christ” (Eph 2:13,14). Now as God’s “dearly loved children” they are privileged to “walk the way of love” (Eph 5:1,2) toward each other.

Paul’s instructions on marriage will always be misapplied by self-centered individuals, who may know some doctrines, but have not been “made…alive together with Christ” (Eph 2:5), like the married couples in the church at Ephesus.

When a husband who is “self-seeking” (Rom 2:8), is selfishly concerned only about himself reads Paul’s instructions about wives submitting themselves to him. They will abuse their wives and children to favor themselves with authoritarian control of others. Paul’s counsel on marriage is deeply spiritual, designed for those who have “put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness” (Eph 4:24).

The Results of Paul’s Instructions

Spirit-filled husbands and wives will allow for no division; their tendency is toward harmony.  How can there be discord or separation when “we both have access in one Spirit to the Father” (Eph 2:18)? The concept of “one Spirit” means the same Spirit in the husband is the same as in the wife.

 How can we have discord in marriage when we both “walk in the same footsteps by the same Spirit?” (2 Cor 12:18). Married couples, which are “filled with the Spirit” (Eph 5:18) will recognize and respect God’s Spirit in each other, allowing the Spirit to lead each of them in their individual paths, both under the direction of the Holy Spirit.

Furthermore, neither the husband nor the wife can claim to know God’s will for the other, in all things. Both will “submit” (Eph 5:21, 22) to the supremacy of the “Spirit of God” (Eph 4:30) or the “Spirit of Christ” (Rom 8:9), or “God’s Spirit” (1 Cor 3:16), which the Holy Spirit represents. So that God “in everything He might have the supremacy” (Col 1:18). It is “unwise” (Eph 5:15) for the Husband or the Wife to act or believe they have the supremacy. God forbid anyone would have the audacity make such a claim!! For it is “God who holds in His hand your life and all your ways” (Dan 5:23).

To Both Husbands and Wives

Ephesians 5:21 Submit to one another [mutual] out of reverence [respect] for Christ. NIV

5:21 Submitting to one another [each other] in the fear of God. NKJV

Submitting to Each Other

  This carries forward the idea of humility. Equally, together, toward each other, their hands and hearts are merged. No husband or wife can claim to be a little higher, a little better, a little wiser than the other. Often the wife will be better at finance then the man. A good man will see the leading of the Lord in their various skills. Each will seek to make the other better and to promote the other for their betterment. Neither will claim a surplus of authority over the other

  The submission of both husband to each other, is out of respect for Christ. The husband submits to his wife who has in her care of the home and other tasks she is assigned to.  The NKJV declares “in the fear of God,” meaning they will keep the will of God, individually for each of them, always uppermost in their minds. The good husband will want his wife to be in communication with the will of God her Father. A good wife will want her husband to be committed in prayer to the will of God for the family.

  Paul started the discussion on the fourth chapter, reminding us to “live a life worthy” of our calling, by being “humble and gentle and patient, bearing with one another in love” (Eph 4:2).

       At the opening of this chapter Paul ask the Ephesians to “Follow God’s example” as “dearly love children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us” (Eph 5:1,2). Paul wants to see that belivers are to “build each other in love” (Eph 4:16), in “accordance with the truth that is in Jesus” (Eph 4:21). All this instruction is fundamental for a Christian marriage. It gives guidance in building a Christian home.

  “In the Lord woman is not independent of man, nor is man independent of woman. For as woman came from man [rib from Eden], so also man is born of woman. But everything comes from God” (1Cor 11:11,12). Women and men are co-dependent on each other, neither can claim to be the most dominant in the creation order. Men need woman to live, or no man would ever be born. Women need men or no woman would ever be born. They are co-dependent, separately they could not exist very long.

To Both Husbands and Wives

Ephesians 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 5:23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head, his body [church], of which he is the Savior. 5:24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. NIV

5:22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 5:23 For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. 5:24 Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. NKJV

5:22 Wives, to the own husbands as to the Lord. 5:23 For the husband is head of the wife as also Christ is the head of the church, He Himself Savior of the body. 5:24 But even as the church is subjected to Christ, so also wives to the own husbands in everything.  Berean Literal Bible

Wives Submit Yourselves, Willingly, to Your Own Husbands, that You Chose to Marry

       The Greek verb submit in verse 22 is missing, which is reflected in the Berean Literal Bible. The verb from the preceding verse, submit to one another, translators have supplied in verse 22.  Submitting to one another carries the idea of orderly submission for purposes of harmony in the universe of God, down into the home.

  The wife is to follow the lead of your own husband; this implies the woman is not to willingly submit to any other man in her life. She is to maintain her independence, as much as possible in the workforce, in church and in society.  

Submitting to her husband, does not mean blindly following every suggestion of her husband. True leadership freely admits that they make mistakes and seeks the advice of his wife, who is in partnership with him, for her advice and wisdom.

       Biblical submission is love based. Jesus was in submission to the will of His Father. At the close of his life he said, “I have brought you glory on earth by finishing the work you gave me to do” (John 17:4). To Jesus His submission to his Father, was not forced. Jesus said, “If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commands and remain in his love” (John 15:10). Order is love based, not forced into submission. Such was the example between the Father and the Son.

       In heaven there is order supported by willing and loving submission. The Holy Spirit is subject to the will of God, Jesus said he “goes out from the Father—he will testify about me” (John 15:26). Even angels have order, the “archangel” (1 Thess 4:16) is an angel of the highest rank, for order among the angels. He sounds the first trumpet at the return of Christ.

       In the Christian home, most often the wife is gifted in bringing order to her home. From the table settings, the pictures on the wall to the clothes sorted and folded in the dresser, the smaller placed on top of the larger.  The children most often are under her care and management. She gives them chores, according to their abilities and ages. The younger children are to follow the directions of the older children. Peter taught that we should “Show proper respect to everyone” (1 Pet 2:17).

       Disorder in the home and in God’s universe, is rebellion and destructive. In order that there will be harmony and peace she submits to her husband.  In disorder there is lying, darkness, hate, pride and every other hurtful evil thing.

       Paul says that wife should submit to their husbands in everything. This means that the wife is not to carry out a double life. This would include lying, pretending to love, but instead deceive and ultimately hurt her family and children. There is to be a high level of transparency between both husband and wife. If the husband is devious, it is nearly impossible for his wife to be transparent.

       The wife is submissive to her husband, for “respect” (Eph 5:33), in his position that God has assigned him, for the purpose of maintaining order in home and family. The husband will submit to his wife’s wishes, in consideration of her role in keeping order at her home with the children and the homes many endless tasks. The children willingly give respect to the will of their father in the tasks he assigns them, in harmony with his wife’s expectations. For “everything should be done in a fitting and orderly way” (1 Cor 14:40).

Husbands are Co-head with Christ, Yet Dependent on Christ

  It is God’s will that there is to be order in the home with the husband taking the leadership. Yet this should be understood as a far different kind of leadership that is carried out by secular society. It is the authority of humble, caring and compassionate love, which is considerate of all who he is responsible for, before God, to whom he is to answer.

He tends his flock like a shepherd:

He gathers the lambs in his arms

and carries them close to his heart.

He gently leads those that have young.

Isa 40:11

  A good husband will lead the wife he loves to trust him. Trust is the foundation for good leadership. His wife will be able to feel safe with her husband.  Although Isaiah is writing about the Lord there is a double application for the sense of security she feels when with her husband. “When I am afraid, I put my trust in you” (Isa 56:3). She trusts his word, his promises and strength he exerts to care for his family.

  When the wife cannot trust the promises of her husband, he has failed and forfeited his appointed leadership role.

Men should understand that their leadership role is an appointment from God, it is not his right. It is not inherent in him, his character, his family heritage or his wealth.

  It is a serious breach of the will of God, when men dominate women or their wives. In doing so they are in violation of the creation order. In this mutually dependent, co-dependent relationship—God designed that man, with his unique skills, talents and strength, to take the leadership. A style of leadership that Jesus taught, which is radically different then kings and presidents have practiced.

  Jesus said, “Anyone who wants to be first must be the very last, and the servant of all” (Mark 9:35). In other words, the male leader works from a servant’s heart, toward his wife and family. Not from as a king on his throne, making demands on his wife and family according to his whims.

       Christ as head overall, is the Savior of the church. Which is part of his body, which He saves those who come to me. Saying “Come, for all things are now ready” (Lk 14:17). The headship of Christ over the church has a dual role. First to save and redeem those who put their trust in them. Second, to “love the church” (Eph 3:25), defective as it most often is.

       The Husband is to be the savior, which is with a small “s” of his family, his wife. In his saver role, he is not to dominate or control but to lead in a protective, always giving manner. In his willingness to offer all his efforts to benefit his family. In his work, his support of his wife and his love, following the example of Christ. He is the trailbreaker and pathfinder for his wife and children for whom he loves with all his heart, with the love that God has given to him.

The Husband will provide support for his family so they will “not want”

He is to lead his family so they can “lie down in green pastures”

He is to use is skills and strength to lead his family “beside the still waters” with no anger.

He is to “restore” confidence when fear and trouble come to his family and wife.

“He leads” his family “in the paths of righteousness” beside himself.

He does all because he follows Christ, his Lord.

       As the co-head with Christ, Christ is not only his role model, but his Savior also. It is a great privilege for a husband to in be submissive union with Christ. For Christ is there to protect and provide the means for the husband to be the savior of his family. Should the husband choose to be oppressive, selfishly demanding his way with no consideration of his wives wishes—he stands to lose the support of Christ, to whom he should be dependent on. He could hear, “Ephraim is joined to idols; leave him alone!” (Hosea (4:27).  

Christ is the Head, Thankfully we are Under His Care

  Yes, “In Christ you have been brought to fullness, He is the head over every power and authority” (Col 2:10). The Greek feminine noun for head is also translated as cornerstone, as a very large stone, making up the corner of a stone wall, which unites and holds, knits together the two walls at their corner.   

  In “The Parable of the Tenants” in Matthew 21 Jesus described himself saying, “Have you never read in the Scriptures: ‘The stone the builders rejected has become the cornerstone [head]. the Lord has done this, and it is marvelous in our eyes’”? [Matt 21:23]. In this reference Jesus predicted that the Gentiles who were rejected by the Jews are now equal to the promises given to them through Abraham. Now they are accepted in Christ, the new head of both Jews and non-Jews, who has become by the will of God the Father, the Cornerstone that holds the two—Jews and Gentiles, together as one.

  Thus the Christian home, both husbands and wives, together, unitedly know that all things in their lives are under the control and direction of Christ and God their Father. Thankfully we are safe in His hands, to whom both husband and wives look to for their “living water” (John 7:38), where Jesus has promise them, “the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life” (John 4:14).

Husband is the Head, Under Christs’ Authority, In Love

  In following the example of Christ, as the head of his family, he is to hold them all together, under the authority of Christ.  In the same matter that Christ demonstrated, “who gave himself for our sins to rescue us from the present evil age” (Gal 1:4). The husband will give of himself, symbolically in his attitudes, to be a good example to save his family from harm, to care for them, and do them good. This is the purpose of his headship.

       The husband is to be the protector of his wife and children. This is awesome care the husband carries. Jesus was a protector of his disciples. When he was about to be arrested, he said to the soldiers that were looking for him, “I told you that I am he. If you are looking for me, then let these men go”. Jesus wished the disciples be spared the ordeal in imprisonment. This happened so that the words he had spoken would be fulfilled: “I have not lost one of those you gave me” (John 18:8,9).

The Role of Being the Head of His Family, Requires Humility.

  “Whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven” (Matt 18:4). Authority is displayed and functions best with humility. Authority does not dominate by force of arms and strength. If it did it would be a bully, dictator and jailer.

  The Father God recognized and honored his Son in his servant role saying, “Here is my servant whom I have chosen, the one I love, in whom I delight; I will put my Spirit on him, and he will proclaim justice to the nations” (Matt 12:18). If Jesus came in a servant role, should not the husband model the same role toward his family and wife. In doing so he will hear his Father in Heaven say to him “well done good and faithful servant.”

  If the husband should force the wife to submit to him, this action is contrary to the way God in Christ has treated us. The wife’s submission is conditional, enough to preserve her life and that of her children. To such a husband, the wife submits in her heart and soul, to a higher man—God her Father, who is the “head over all” (1 Chron 29:11) who is “Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all” (Eph 4:6).

  God in Christ does not hit us with his hands, knocking us to the ground, demanding our obedience. Saying do it my way or else. Such a man “is dead in (his) transgressions and sins” (Eph 2:1). Who is “alienated from God… enemies in your minds because of your evil behavior” (Col 1:21).

Wives  Submit Yourselves to Your own Husbands, as she Submits to her Lord

       Paul is asking the wife to voluntarily submit herself to his husband, for her good. Not in the role of her lord over her all, for only “Jesus Christ…is Lord of all” (Acts 10:36). But in his role as a cornerstone headship and servant leadership. A good man will always remember that he is to model both roles at the same time, as he submits himself to God as his head. Meaning that the husband will be prayerful and studious in Scriptures to know the will of God for his family.

       God has made the male of our race to have and internal need to hole things together, of constructing and building up something by his physical efforts. The woman, God gave to man, was to provide helpful support, for him to build up and hold together his wife and children, home, career and a thousand other things.

For a man not to have a binding responsibility is to leave him very vulnerable and lazy. as Samson a single man, to wastefulness, selfishness and bad judgment. God knew that man does not function well alone very long for God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him” (Gen 2:18).

The submission of the wife to the husband, does place her in a position, in our fallen world, to often appeal to her head, Christ Jesus, on behalf of her husband’s faults and flaws. A woman makes this commitment in love and as assigned to her by God. For a woman has an internal urgent need to have a family, to be loved and cherished by her children and her husband. To deny this God assigned order, leaves her at the mercy of ungoverned men or other women in our fallen world. Often to her disgrace.

To the Husband whom the Wife is Submitted

      How should a husband respond to his wife who is looking to him for strength, protection, support and “love” (5:25)?

       When Paul wished to settle some difficult issues in the Corinth church he did not use authority that was his as an Apostle of the Lord, he would not use “harsh” authority, instead “use of authority—the authority the Lord gave me for building you up, not for tearing you down” (2 Cor 13:10). There is a considerable witness in Scriptures in the use of authority for the purpose of building others up.

  The words of a husband can crush the joy of life from his wife; he is charged by God to love and care for. If a husband uses his actions to threaten or in violence, he will have to answer to God, who has authority over him. The wife, should pray to her Father in Heaven saying, “When I am afraid, I put my trust in you” (Isa 456:3), not her abusive husband.

  To men, to husbands take note of how your God appointed authority is to be exercised. Be warned, your authority is only temporary. Any abuse toward your wife or family places you in serious danger before God.  

“So even if I boast somewhat freely about the authority the Lord gave us for building you up rather than tearing you down, I will not be ashamed of it.” 2 Cor 10:8

“From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work” (4:16).

“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen” (4:29).

“Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing” (1Thess 5:11).

“Each of us should please our neighbors for their good, to build them up” (Rom 15:2).

“Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way, you will fulfill the law of Christ” (Gal 6:2)

“We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves. Each of us should please our neighbors for their good, to build them up” (Rom 15:1,2).

 “And we urge you, brothers and sisters, warn those who are idle and disruptive, encourage the disheartened, help the weak, be patient with everyone. 15 Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong, but always strive to do what is good for each other and for everyone else” (1 Thess 5:14,15).

To Husbands

Ephesians 5:25 Husbands, love your [a possessive pronoun] wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 5:26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word [of God], 5:27 and to present her [the church] to himself [Christ] as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 5:28 In this same way, husband’s ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. NIV

5:25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, 5:26 that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, 5:27 that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. 5:28 So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. NKJV

  The is a very specific thing that Paul says is primary. In the husband’s leadership role. He is to LOVE his WIFE. This may seem natural to a young man, and it is God’s design. Love, in its various expressions, is to be the binding cord that will always hold the family and their marriage together.

  A husband is better able to show compassion, kindness, and empathy for his wife, if he has come to know, to have tasted for himself, the love of God. If a believing husband is selfish having little understanding for his wife or their little ones, rest assured that he does not know God, “Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love” (1 John 4:8).

Washing with Water

  This is a reference to Jesus who said, “unless they are born of water and the Spirit…no one can enter the kingdom of God” (John 3:5). In the symbol of water baptism we are buried and risen with Christ to “live a new life” (Rom 6:4), a new creation.  The husband’s role is evangelistic in his love, for his wife and family. Above receiving the warm tender and attentive love from his wife, which fills the inner need of man in which he is incomplete without. The Husband will keep spiritual interest prominently placed among his responsibilities toward his wife and family. He will encourage them to go to church, to participate in youth programs, to make good friends and pray for them. Above things, a husband needs to pray for his wife and family. Above all of the above, the husband should know for himself what it means to be “born of God” (1 John 5:1) and “born of the Spirit”  From the Holy Spirit, comes “sincere love” (2 Cor 6:6), and the fruits of the Spirit (John 3:6).

The fruit of the Spirit is

love, joy, peace,

patience, kindness, goodness,

faithfulness, gentleness, self-control

Gal 5:22,23 NAS

  They will not be in short supply, when a man that loves his wife and loves God, both at the same time. Under this condition it is very likely that their married life will be charming and attractive to both husband and wives, all their lives. What a joy there will be when both husbands still love God, love their children and love each other as they age together, in their lives.

  If there is any violence on the part of the husband, it will have a corrupting influence on their marriage love, for his time on earth. For in the time of Noah, “the earth was corrupt in God's sight, and the earth was filled with violence” (Gen 6:11). Their violence shorted their time on earth, and the flood waters rose, all their love of violence was replaced with fear of death.

Both Husbands and Wives

Ephesians 5:29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 5:30 for we [husbands & wives] are members of his body. 5:31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”  (Gen 2:24) NIV

5:29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. 5:30 For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones. 5:31 “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” NKJV

One Flesh, Two Bodies Unitedly Care For the Other

  One flesh carries the idea of growth over the years. Like two plants that have become intertwined while one plant transforms the other into a new likeness. Over time it becomes hard to tell them apart. They are viewed as indispensable toward each other. When one is undernourished, the other suffers as well.

  Both spouses are to regard each other as believers “in Christ,” both attached to the “true vine” (John 15:1). They become part of God’s body on earth. Each will wish to give each other the best care, the best love and attention to the needs of the other. As they care for each other’s lives, each other’s hopes, each other’s dreams, each other’s prayers, each other’s health, each other’s mental and spiritual health—the two become one flesh.

One Flesh Will Make it Unnecessary for the Wife to Submit to her Own Husband.

  One flesh means they share the benefits, blessings and challenges—not separately but together. What affects one of them with joy or sorrows, moves the other.  The prosperity of one never creates jealousy of the other. The physical or emotional pain in one of them moves the other to compassion. When they are one flesh, the submission of the wife to her husband becomes mute.

  The roles of submission may be reversed, maybe shared, maybe suspended, because the two have become one together. Under this, neither will demand, or even wish to have authority over the other. They know how each other thinks, on almost every subject, they move in concert with each other. They think and act like the other.

One would not hurt the other by forcing his or her will on the other unless imminent danger is present. Both use their strength to aid the other. When one makes a mistake in a word or deed, confession is immediate. They pray together and submit themselves to God together, as well as they pray separately. It they would be asked who takes the lead in their marriage, they both would say at the same time—pointing and naming the other. The idea of what some call male headship, is so far from their minds, that it would appear as if one has become a bully over the other. Which they both would reject as totally unnecessary and oppressive.

  As they age, even the roles of male and female that started their marriage with, are reversed. The wife may have to care for her husband. The husband may have to take care for many home chores, due to his wife’s poor health. Roles means next to nothing to them. It is both, for both of them, in love, with love, by love, through love, in view of love, for love’s sake without hate or ill-will for the other existing for even one second. It is love that needs not be reminded to love the other. It is love that has no end in sight, as they love each other and can’t dream or think it being any different than being loved, wholeheartedly, by the other.

United, Not Two

  In their lives, they are together in life, not separate. Not living just for their single interest. They leave their separate single birth identity. Now they work in harmony with each other, forgiving each other, committed to each other with no selfishness at the expense of the other. Neither would make an important decision that would be contrary wishes of o the other. They are One Flesh, all together with God in the center. Not either the male or the female.

Ephesians 5:33 However, each one of you [men] also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. NIV

5:33 Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. NKJV

  Paul is nothing unsaid in his marriage counsel, before he leaves this subject. Some men will automatically assume that the wife’s duty is to submit to him. Because of his ideas of the way things are to be done, she should accept without argument. When love is present, good men, cannot seek to control their wives, because it is not the way of voluntary love. Force is an element of darkness.

  Paul tells each of the Ephesian men, you must love your wives, in the same measure as you care for yourself. In practical terms a man will not demand of his wife what he would not do for himself, when it is inconvenient or difficult for her

       Why would Paul have to tell men, they must love their wives. Paul is talking about after the wedding and early years of marriage. He encourages men to not ever forget the reason he got married was for love, “continue in faith, (and) love” (2 Tim 2:15) and “follow the way of love” (1 Cor 14:1). For if I “have not love, I am nothing” (1 Cor 13:2 NKJV). Now in the seasons of life, “these three remain: faith, hope, and love; but the greatest of these is love” (1 Cor 13:13).

  The wife must encourage and support her husband in her love for him, as he may fumble and make mistakes in their married life. She respects him in spite of difficulties, she makes allowance for his needs, without him even knowing it. Since the word reverence is often associated with the worship of God, she prays for him, in sickness and in health. When he overreaches his authority in demanding of his wife harder work than is warranted for her health. She prays to her higher authority—"Our Father which art in heaven” for help. To “receive mercy and find grace to help us (her) in our (her) time of need” (Heb 4:16). Then she appeals to him, in her warm loving embrace, encouraging him to make better choices, in love.

  A wife is called to love and respect her husband. Divorce should be the very last resort, for love received from God should look to prevail against all odds. If a wife seeks the fast or easy way out of home trials, she will have to answer to God.

Wife Should Respect her Husband’s Family

       We know of a story where a man who wife of many years died and a few years later married a younger woman.  After her marriage she arranged to inherit husband’s farmhouse and his large acreage. A few years later he died. Although she had a legal right to the property, it was disrespectful to his sons and daughters, whose property was their inheritance. She did not respect her husband’s family in the least. She sold everything and oved out of state.  

       We know of another man whose first wife died and later in life he met another woman at church, and they married. They were very compatible and kind to each other. He lived in her home and when she died, he did not keep anything but made sure that her family received their inheritance, when he could have sought to benefit himself first.

Both Husband and Wives

The Center Point: From Which the Whole Account is Supported and Understood

5:32 This is a profound mystery—

but I am talking about Christ and the church. NIV

A Profound Mystery

  A mystery so large, so great, in size, in age, in importance, in the widest possible sense. This mystery is so great it is impossible to solve. It is without a solution in human terms.

Profound Mystery Explained:

  This is the “mystery of Christ” not “made known” to any other generation in its fulness, but “now has been revealed by the Spirit” (Eph 3:5). What is this mystery?

First Of All

  It that God has “lavished on us, with all wisdom and understanding” to now “make known to us the mystery of his will” which was revealed by “His good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ…to bring unity to all things in heaven and on earth under Christ” (Eph 1:8-10). The Gospel account of the birth and life of Jesus is unparalleled to any human living or dead. No one in previous centuries could have even imagined the impact this one life has had on billions of people.

Second Of All:

  “It is that through the gospel the Gentiles are heirs together with Israel, members of one body and sharers together in the promise of Christ” (Eph 3:4-9). God’s “purpose was to create in Himself one new humanity out of the two, thus making peace,” in “one body to reconcile both of them to God through the cross, by which he put to death their hostility,” now “both have access to the Father by one Spirit” (Eph 2:15, 18).

  God wants to unite both Jews and Gentiles by breaking down the “wall of hostility” (Eph 2:14) between Jews and Gentiles and create “one new humanity, out of the two, thus making peace” (Eph 2:15). Today the there are many more walls of hostility, between English, Asians, Hispanics, Islanders, Africans, Europeans, white and black. The Christian faith brings them together in one new humanity. How does this happen? It is in the wisdom of God that this is possible, as believers love and care for each other.

  Thus, it is imperative that we learn how to fellowship and worship God together, with no racial or ethnic differences allowed between all of us as belivers. No one is superior to another, better than another. No one has the right to dominate in leadership.  “From him the whole body, joined and held together [by love] by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does it’s work” (Eph 4:16).

Application:

  Through the “Gospel of peace” (6:15) both man and woman, are “united” (5:31). The union between Jews and Gentiles is carried by Paul not only to marriage but to the church at large. Listen to Paul’s unmistakable appeal: “I appeal to you, brothers and sisters, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another in what you say and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be perfectly united in mind and thought” (1 Cor 1:10). To applies to the church at large, but is seen first in marriage, where man and woman are “united in mind and thought” with Christ as their head, not either one of them claiming to be the first leader in the family.

  They keep their unity “of the Spirit through the bond of peace” (Eph 4:3). No one will break the bond that the “One Spirit” (Eph 4:4) has created by making his “dwelling” (2:22) place in both husband and wife. If they break that “bond” with arguments and disagreements that create a separation resulting in bitterness, they risk losing the Holy Spirit, the source of their spiritual life.

To Wives

       The word “head” should be understood as a “cornerstone” that unites two walls, it is in reference to Christ (Eph 2:20). Thus, the wife and husband are part of the same wall, in that they need each other. For each are built in opposite directions forming a wall but united on one cornerstone—Christ Himself.

  When men claim headship over their wives, it is to be under the governance of Christ which has paired them together on his promises and life. “Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. (2 Cor 3:17), for both husband and wife. The freedom of forgiveness, love, redemption and a promised inheritance as children of God. The freedom for the wife to be led by the Lord in her convictions and direction for her life. Freedom for man to permit his wife to lean on faith in Christ, before and above himself.

  Spirit filled men will model after Christ where He provided free grace and justification from all his sins, with the love of God. Husbands are to “walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved” them (Eph 5:2). Thus the husband will express, sacrificial love, like Christ did for him, toward his wife. The husband is to model Christ as Paul previously said, “Follow God’s example as dearly loved children” (Eph 5:1). If the husband should abuse his wife, God will hold him responsible and accountable. God will come to the rescue of the wife that loves God and is abused, at the expense of the husband.

  If the husband has been transformed by the Spirit’s influence and by the grace of God. The husband should realize that he, as much as his wife belong to God. Both have been set apart and chosen to be a loving family, belonging to God. “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience” (Col 3:12). The husband will want his wife to be in heaven with him and wish to love her there also.

  The husband will not run a course of action that must be hidden from his wife. He will make “every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace” (Eph 4:3). Lies will break the bond of peace.

  The husband will regard his wife’s life and health, not belonging to him, but to Christ her redeemer, a member of the body of Christ. This means that the husband will willingly give his wife the same food or medicine that he uses for his health. He will not withhold pleasures such as massages or health club membership from his wife. He will not buy better clothes, a newer car or permit himself vacations that she is not invited. If she is overworked in raising several small children, he will for-go his time with the guys, to be her support. He will not hide from her their finances, allowing her a small part in comparison to what he wants to spend on his hobbies and personal pursuits. The good husband will be “good news” to his wife in all things. He would not force himself to have his way, following his ideas, his plans as if her voice did not matter at all. Such a husband may go to church, pay tithe, repeat Bible stories and know about prophecy—but this does not matter at all if he does not “love” his “wife” as “himself” (Eph 5:28).

  The truth is that the husband’s salvation is very much dependent on how he treats his wife and children. Jesus told Nicodemus that unless one is “Born Again” and “Born of the Spirit,” they will “not see the Kingdom of God.” To mistreat a woman is a sure sign that this individual does not know the God of love, the earliest and most lasting sign that a believer has been born from above.

  Paul wrote to the Thessalonian believers, “Now about your love for one another we do not need to write to you, for you yourselves have been taught by God to love each other” (1 Thess 4:9). When we walk with God, it will be natural to love our spouses. If not, we are nearly lost for eternity.

To Both Husbands & Wives:

  Both are to realize they are to be “united” (5:31), in one body, one spirit, one faith, one love, one hope and one calling. They are to be “encouraged in heart and united in love” (Col 2:2). “Live a life filled with love, following the example of Christ, as He loved us” (5:2 NLT). “Serve one another humbly in love” (Gal 5:13).

  Remember, as discussed at the beginning of this section, these passages on marriage are directed to Ephesian men and women that have been “made alive with Christ” and are “seated with him in heavenly realms in Christ Jesus” (Eph 5,6).  Should a husband who does not know the Love of God, through the Spirit, claim to be the head of his wife, the consequences could be imprisonment of women. Paul did not have this in mind since he is directing his letter to those that “were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light” (Eph 5:8).

God’s Last Two Commandments: Have Faith and Love One Another

“And this is his commandment: to believe [have faith] in the name of his Son, Jesus Christ, and to love one another as he commanded us [He gave the commandment to us]. The one who keeps God’s [two] commands lives in him, and he in them. (John 3:23,24)

“Anyone who loves their brother and sister lives [abides] in the light, and there is nothing in them to make them stumble [walks with light on their path]. But anyone who hates a brother or sister is in the darkness and walks around in the darkness. They do not know where they are going, because the darkness has blinded them” (1 John 2:10,11).

“For this is the message you heard from the beginning: We should love one another. Do not be like Cain, who belonged to the evil one [Satan] and murdered his brother” (1 John 3:11,12).

  Murder can be where the wife or husband tries to destroy by lies the character of each other. This is work of the Evil One. Unless confessed, your reward will be the same as the Evil One.

The End of the 5th Chapter of Ephesians

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